ONLINE DATING

Can you relate to any of the following statements?

• You find yourself downloading every animated emoticons in order to have someone to chat with each day.
• You claim to be fluently bilingual ever since you've mastered net lingo ('2morrow', 'lol', 'btw'...).
• You not only have an account with Myspace, Facebook, Bebo, Buzznet, LastFM, Classmates.com, Flickr, Youtube, Discogs, Friends Reunited, Friendsters, Adult Friend Finder, LastFM, Meetup.com, Reunion.com...you also find the time to update EACH every day.
• When you share your holiday anecdotes with coworkers, you're proud to be the only person in your office who claims to have visited all 7 continents...yet, fail to mention it was done whilst perusing Google Earth... and that you were really looking for nude sunbathers.
• You get all your facts about anything and everything through Wikipedia.

• Does your keyboard look like this?

If you've answered Yes to any of these, you not only have serious issues to address but your lack of social skills has become encyclopedic.


Here's a tip on how to give your genes some fighting chance in evolution.

Download some of the following MP3s and let the music create a therapeutic ambiance whilst you discover the joys of...

ONLINE DATING FOR THE ODD AND DOWNRIGHT OBNOXIOUS.

Karen Finley - Tales of Taboo










Revolting Cocks - Do Ya Think I'm Sexy







Sigue Sigue Sputnik - Love Missile F1-11

WEBSITES:

Date A Rocker
"We're Sexy, We're Hot, We're Ready To Rock" ...oh dear.


Date My Pet
This site's Mantra is "Date Me, Date My Pet"...users are asked to specify what they AND their pet is looking for—in a date.


Daily Diapers
A site catering for that child in you...who likes to dress up in diapers...as a sexual fetish.


Hot Saints
Chase and be Chaste!!! An online dating site for the good folks of The Latter Day Saints (Mormons). Chaperons not included.


Millionaire Match
A great place to score Playboy Bunny Rejects. This site has been rated "Best of the Web" by Forbes.com. and apparently highlights the "millionaires" in its listings" by Wall Street Journal.


Marry an Ugly Millionaire
What Millionaire Match really is, but failed dramatically in the honesty department.


Astro Dating
Because stars hold the key to each Zodiac's love, happiness and success...Except for Scorpio, who's ruling planet was Pluto. You're planet's now obsolete thus making you insignificant. Might I suggest reestablishing some form of existence by taking up Chinese Astrology, Numerology or Runes?


Dharma Match
Because spiritually, you know just how important it is to meet a soulmate who can tune his chakkras with yours and who's aura is filled with colors that compliment your newly refurbished Feng Shui-friendly house.

Scorpios - yer still out of luck.

Trek Passion
For Trekkies...Yes, they still exists. Here.